The Pillar of Confidence

The Essence of Connection

Connection is the cornerstone of leadership. It’s about building genuine relationships, fostering empathy, and inspiring others. When we connect with people on a deeper level, we create a sense of belonging, trust, and shared purpose.

the goal: weave a rich tapestry of relationships

Why Connection Matters

  • Stronger Teams: Connection fosters collaboration, teamwork, and a positive work environment.
  • Increased Productivity: Engaged and connected teams are more productive and innovative.
  • Improved Morale: Strong relationships boost morale and job satisfaction.
  • Enhanced Reputation: A reputation for strong relationships can open doors to new opportunities.

Tips for Building Strong Connections:

  • Active Listening: Give your full attention to others and truly listen to what they have to say.
  • Empathy: Put yourself in other people’s shoes and understand their perspective.
  • Authenticity: Be genuine and authentic in your interactions.
  • Vulnerability: Share your own experiences and challenges to build trust.
  • Positive Reinforcement: Recognize and appreciate the contributions of others.

Conclusion

Humans are social creatures. We crave connection like plants crave sunlight. It is the invisible thread that binds us to others, fostering a sense of belonging, purpose, and joy. It is the foundation of strong relationships, vibrant communities, and a flourishing society. Connection is essential. Connection isn’t just about being in the same space as others; it’s about forming genuine bonds, building trust, and sharing a sense of shared understanding. It’s about feeling seen, heard, and valued for who you truly are.

By prioritizing connection, you can create a more positive and fulfilling work environment, build stronger relationships, and achieve greater success. Remember, the power of connection is a powerful tool for leaders.

NOTES

Check out our Book of Beautiful Bowls Here. Fourteen amazing bowls to feed your family and your soul. Filled with cuisines from around the world, you won’t be lacking in any more menus for your week.

cravings, temptations, + appetite challenges

A PreMenstrual Disorder Perspective Podcast to help women know that health is personal and possible. Like, share, and subscribe for more. @adagiofit on IG

***Note: these thoughts are in no way to replace your physician. If you have questions, please consult your doctor and professionals for direction before you make any changes in your health. I am not a doctor, just a coach. Also, these podcast may contain information that is sensitive in nature and might be triggering. Please listen with caution. Thank you.***

Sign up for a FREE consult at www.adagiofit.com

***LISTEN TO THE PODCAST IN A WEB BROWSER AT ADAIGOFIT.COM***

Cravings, temptation, and an appetite that just won’t seem to go away. These are some of the biggest struggles people have when going through premenstrual disorders.

Broadly speaking, people know which foods are fairly healthy, and which aren’t so healthy. And, when dieting, these people want to lose weight; that’s the reason they’re dieting, after all.

So, they know what they want to achieve, and roughly know which foods they should be eating. So why are long term success rates so low?

It’s because cravings, temptation, and your appetite eventually wear you down. Once the initial motivation you had begins to wane, it becomes harder to resist these. Your brain doesn’t want you to lose weight.

In an evolutionary sense, food was scarce. So, a drive to eat meant greater chances of survival and therefore passing on your genes. The difference now is that food is not scarce. In fact, it’s abundant. We are surrounded by high-calorie, high-reward food, but we still have a brain geared towards survival in a very different environment. This mismatch is a key reason why dieting is so hard.

Remove temptation from your environment

Clear out tempting foods, don’t keep them in the house. If it’s out of sight, it’s out of mind. If this isn’t feasible because you live with others and they won’t accept you throwing out the junk, then hide tempting foods instead. Keep them in separate cupboards, away from the ones you usually use. Keep them in opaque containers so you can’t see them. It’s amazing how small changes like this can have a big impact on our behavior.

You want to make it harder to eat unhealthy foods. Our brain wants to minimize effort, so increase the effort it takes to make poor choices. For example, having to go to the shops to buy a chocolate bar is a lot more effort than just picking it out of the snack drawer.

Willpower is like a muscle, you can only use it a certain amount of times before it’s weakened. So, don’t rely on willpower. Instead, alter your environment so you don’t need to use willpower every time you enter the kitchen.

Create an environment that supports your goals, not one that sabotages them.

2. Separate eating from other activities

Eat at the dinner table. Don’t eat while watching the TV, or while scrolling through your phone. You want to minimize distractions that take you away from the experience of eating.

Eat slowly. Separating eating from other activities will naturally allow you to slow down, focus on your food, and be more mindful when eating. You will feel more full and satisfied after eating in this way.

If you stop eating while watching the TV, for example, your brain stops associating food with these activities. If you’re used to watching TV in the evening with a few biscuits, you’ll find you start to think about biscuits when you sit down in front of the TV. Your brain has learned that evening TV = biscuit time and will urge you, through cravings, to continue this habit.

If you separate these activities, your brain stops associating them. If you have a rule that you don’t eat in front of the TV, the effort required to get a snack and sit at the table without your phone or TV means you’re unlikely to do it unless you’re truly hungry. 

Again, it comes down to increasing the effort required to make poor dietary choices.

3. Stop snacking

Controversial, right? You don’t have to stop it completely, but I would recommend focusing on full meals first and foremost.

Snacking throughout the day, without having full meals, can lead to what I call the Not-Quite Cycle™. This is when you spend your whole day being not-quite hungry between meals, and not-quite satisfied after meals. This sucks.

Snack foods are typically easy to over eat and don’t fill you up. Think crisps, sweets, chocolate and other processed, packaged snack foods. You’d be better off saving these calories for a filling, nutritious meal.

If you do snack, choose things like fruit and plain yoghurt. These are minimally-processed, highly satiating, and therefore hard to overeat.

4. Limit hyper-palatable foods

Hyper-palatable just means tasty and easy to overeat. A combination of fat/salt/sugar is often what makes foods hyper-palatable. These types of food rarely occur naturally, and so are often highly-processed and calorie-dense.

Your brain get familiar with these tastes and that’s how cravings develop. Even protein bars, fiber one bars, and other ‘low calorie’ or ‘healthy’ snacks would still fall into this category. That’s not at all to say you can’t include them in your diet. But, if you’re someone who struggles with your appetite and cravings, it may be wise to forego them.

5. Prioritize high satiety, minimally-processed whole foods

These are foods like fruits, vegetables, lean meats, potatoes, fish, eggs, wholegrains, beans and legumes, oats, and plain yoghurt.

These foods are hard to overeat. They are often less-calorie dense, higher protein, and higher fiber, meaning they are highly satiating and therefore, you’re unlikely to over-consume them.

6. Don’t allow hunger to become extreme

Intermittent fasting is a useful tool but it’s not magic, and it’s not for everyone. You need to find what works for you. If you can happily skip breakfast and have lunch as your first meal, go for it. But, if trying to fast leads you to overeat later in the day, then don’t do it! I can’t believe I have to say this, but I do. Again, it’s not magic, it’s just one method. – if it doesn’t work for you, try a different method.

Spreading your meals evenly throughout the day can help to keep you hunger levels under control, and prevent you falling into the Not-Quite Cycle™, or restricting to the point where you end up overeating.

7. Consult your future self

This is a psychological technique called episodic future-thinking. It involves removing yourself from the present moment, and thinking about how this decision is going to affect you in the future. 

Remember your goals, the reasons why you’re dieting, and the hard work you’ve put in so far. Ask yourself this question: “would my future self thank me for the decision I’m about to make?”

If you’re following the 6 previous strategies, then your cravings will be more like an occasional whisper, rather than a persistent chatter. Consulting your future self can allow you to look at the big picture, and make the right decision for you.

Here’s a quick recap of the eight strategies to manage your appetite:

Remove temptation from your environment

Separate eating from other activities

Stop snacking

Limit hyper-palatable foods

Priorities minimally-processed whole foods

Don’t allow hunger to become too extreme

Consult your future self

Manage your stress and sleep

Following this advice could be the difference between reaching your goals or not. Read it, understand it, implement it. Words mean nothing if you don’t put it into action. So, give yourself a checklist of action points to take away from this article, and it could change your life for the better.

Pruning + Failure

tree-crown-thinning - ArborCare
PC: www.aborcare.com

Tonight I am sitting with a list of endeavors I am in the middle of, in front of me. I look at each one knowing the dreams, investments both of time and money, and potential of each one I have had.

What’s the problem then? Well, the problem is that I am an inch deep and miles wide instead of being a mile deep and an inch wide. I know being a multi-endeavor entrepreneur isn’t wrong. I have been a Jane of ALL trades my whole life. I know I can do each item on this list, but frankly I am burning out.

Maybe if COVID didn’t hit us this year I’d still be sailing along, but this year has kicked my trash. Hopefully I am not the only one, but I have not thrived or pivoted well. I have struggled to find my footing and purpose. Each endeavor has had massive roadblocks and misty roads.

So I am going to prune my growing tree. To be honest, it isn’t the cutting that I am worried about, it is the shame of what others will think about me and what I will hold against myself later. “Failure” is written all over the inside of my eyelids. 

I am afraid I will feel and be viewed as a failure to others and myself. 

We prune our fruit trees every November (fitting huh) to make sure that after a period of hibernation, our trees may flourish and stay healthy and fruitful. Guess what? Sometimes when we prune we don’t get a lot of fruit the next season. But two or three later? That’s when the reward comes. 

Pruning hurts and doesn’t feel or look good. I can just hear my trees griping because they are funny shaped, naked, and they worked so hard to grow that one ridiculously tall branch this year. I, too, feel that way when I am pruned… cut down to size, humbled, and naked. 

But to quote my hubby and my fave series right now, “This is the way.” It is something that must be done. 

So what do I kick off my plate? How do you determine what you drop off your plate? 

Some things I have looked at this week:

  • Where can I have the deepest influence? – notice, not the widest influence. I’d rather leave a lasting impact on a few instead of a minor run in with many. 
  • I love all that I am pursuing so the next question has been, during this flood of COVID and stress for me, which activity have I actually looked forward to and want to prepare for? Which ones do I find myself putting off or feeling anxious about? Maybe those procrastinating activities are not the activities I need to be in, maybe they are, but I am curious about defining how I feel about each one. 
  • What have I felt pulled and drawn to by a higher power? I am a christian and rely heavily on the powers that be to guide my life. I don’t care who or what you believe in, you usually feel and are pushed in certain directions. I call these personal revelations. 
  • What areas are the best for my family in this stage of life? My kids are still pretty young. I have some commitments I need to keep with them and my hubby that are taking a lot of my time this school year. Maybe next year it will be different or if we go to online schooling, but right now, I am committed. So I want to keep a balanced family life and career life…. That is HARD to do BTW. We are inundated with personal growth, self care, etc messages that I don’t feel successful if I am not growing my company or personal achievements. 
  • So that brings me to another question of what is my priority? I can only have one. Hmm… family. That means for me that I am home when my kids are home and try not to have work hours during those times. That being said, I do have to work during those hours so how do I balance that? 
  • Next, what are my values and guiding principles? These are characteristics of myself that no matter what route I take I will keep. However, there are some endeavors that favor those values and principles more easily than others. 
  • Finally, what are my gut feelings? I don’t think that decisions can be good if you are not all on board. That means, for me, that sometimes I need to wait it out and float until decisions become apparent. So if there are people pushing me for a decision, it probably isn’t the right one unless I have the “hell yes!” answer right away. (“Brene Brown”ing again)

Think about your trees and what could be taken off and what needs more of your focus to grow. That is going to look different for everyone. Maybe you need to work on a weak area, maybe you need to keep the strong even stronger. 

I usually brain dump the areas that I am working on and all the smaller activities and pursuits that area is requiring. Then I can visually rework, cross out, or newly sketch my future. 

Well, hopefully this is something you can look at when you need to prune your tree. You interested in knowing which branches of mine stay? Me too, guys, me too.

And finally, other people’s percetions, comments, and reactions to your life decisions have nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. Do not let them sway you otherwise and stay strong in your answers. Which is WHY you MUST work these branches out for yourselves or you’ll end up with some dark magic branles that keep regrowing without your consent.

I’m always open to coaching your through these concepts I talk about. Shoot me an email clarissa@adagiofit.com if you want to set up a session with me on them.

#24 – Urges + Cravings

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In the podcast today we are talking all about urges and cravings. What does it take to make a craving and answer a craving – the science of our brains is amazing. We also chat about tools we can use to rewire our brains to answer our cravings differently using the PAZ technique.

After you listen, leave us some feedback right below here in our show notes! We’d love to start a conversation. Also, I mentioned in the podcast about a free mini session… those sign ups are in the link below!

#15 – Comparison

Comparing is a dangerous game. Did you know we have a choice if we want to play. However, most of us get in the habit of comparing and we do it unconsciously.

In this podcast we are talking about comparison and bringing ourselves to awareness that we probably do it without thinking. When we become aware of our habit in comparing, then we are able to make a conscious choice if we want to engage.

I have heard many times in the past to choose not to engage in comparing. BUT you can choose to compare. As long as you compare fairly. When you compare fairly it takes a lot of the danger out of the game.

How do you do that – comparing fairly? Listen in below for the tools that I give for going through this process.

SHOW NOTES:

  • I am putting together Q&A for another podcast coming up in July. I’d love if you have any questions about comparing or any other subject we’ve talked about here on the podcast that you submit them below in the comments or you can email me at clarissa@adagiofit.com. I’d love to hear from you.
  • June 27th is the final day to sign up for our JUNE COACHING CLASS on Macros. Click here for more details and to sign up!